I lost a cousin to suicide when I was in high school. He hung himself when his mother wouldn't let him go out. In fact, he was my age and I had to grapple with this confusion for quite awhile... "How could he be so desperate? Why would he ruin something so precious over something so seemingly insignificant? When would my life be considered so unbearable that I could no longer go on?"

Suicide levels in India are among the highest in the world. It’s estimated that over 100,000 people take their own lives every year in India, and India accounts for 10% of the world’s suicides. Why? For most of us, young people especially, the high pressures of failing to meet the expectations of our parents, mediocre exam grades, rejection from prestigious schools and relationship failure drive us to consider ending our lives prematurely. Concerns over finances, depression, loneliness, and the cultural and generational clashes drive many to unthinkable extremes.

Anxiety and stress are central issues for many suicides. The extraordinary high standards that young people feel we must hold ourselves to cause every success to look mediocre, and every failure to seem like the world will collapse around us. We panic when we don’t achieve perfect scores, or are accepted into a world-renown university, or fail to find love early on.

First, if you are considering suicide or have ever experienced similar thoughts, talk to someone you care about. Too often, families and friends are completely unaware of the distress and emotional difficulty being faced, as my family was. A suicide note should never be the first time that they are made aware of this. Tell someone you know will listen with gentleness and respect. Then, find help. See a psychiatrist or a doctor and ask about available medications and therapy, if necessary. Depression can be a medical condition, so you should let your doctor know right away if you experience this unending loneliness and pain. Consider why you are feeling this way. Is it because of your own expectations, or the expectations of others? All expectations should be evaluated for their validity and their ability to be realistic.

Those you love will understand – they care for you. No, they don’t know all the circumstances, and perhaps they cannot even begin to feel your pain, but you should give them a chance to try. I don’t believe that any parent, teacher, friend or family member ever cared more about a mistake than about the person who made the mistake. Even if you don’t value the opinions of others, consider that God values you- you are important to God. He has given you life to live to its fullest and not to silence it prematurely. There is a special purpose and plan for your life in particular, and when you begin to know that purpose you will understand how valuable your life is.

Try to begin to look beyond your current circumstances. Think about how important this will be in the distant future. Even the most embarrassing and memorable circumstances are forgotten. Most importantly, give yourself a break. Sometimes doors close, and a careful plan that you may have been depending on will fall through. It hurts when that happens… a lot. That instability can be crushing and scary, but consider that because things didn’t go quite the way you hoped they would, you now have the freedom to do something else…maybe even something better. Step back, examine your heart and consider that you are capable of being bigger than your circumstances. There are people that want to help you to do that. (Login to Mahalife Counseling and talk to your personal counselor)

Nothing is worth ending your life over. Circumstances may be terrible but they last a relatively short time. It’s hard to see this though, in the midst of such pain and suffering. Sometimes things may get so bad that you think that they couldn’t possibly get worse. They may get worse, but they will always get better eventually. Consider the opportunities for success and love and friendship that you’ll lose if you decide that this one difficulty is worth taking your own life. Things may be different than you pictured, but life can be just as wonderful. Love and appreciate yourself as others do, and you can begin with support and time, to bring yourself back to the life you once had- one that you cherished and valued.

- By Kendra